Second Chance

My family and I were blessed by our Sunday School class as they sent us off with a picnic. We will be leaving in a short two weeks and they wanted to have a get-together...to thank us I guess. But...the reality is...we should thank them.

We were welcomed into the class from day one. They were friendly and receptive of us both...and when Maggie was born we were REALLY accepted. There were bumps and bruises along the way at times...but those are good.

Toward the end of the picnic someone thanked me for giving them a second chance. You see...we had certainly not gotten off to a good start with one another. He saw me as sitting in my ivory tower...while I...in all honesty...saw him the same way. I believe there is truth to perceptions. Whether I or he wanted to admit it...we probably in some sense came across that way somehow. The shocking thing to me was when I received a message via email from this person who stated...bluntly...that he did not care for me.

I was shocked. How could someone say something like this? Some Christian he was, I thought. However, as time progressed...I began to respect what he did. You see...too often we hold back from revealing what we truly feel. We reserve our emotions and hesitate to be honest with one another. Accountability is an important part of Christianity...and sometimes...that means being honest. Why is it that this is so hard for most people? The answer: because it is not "nice". We are taught to be nice...not honest. We are taught that if we can't say something nice don't say anything at all...not honesty.

Is our relationship perfect now? I don't know. I could probably be better but distance and schedules (and gas prices) made it difficult to attend the men's lunches and really invest in building a relationship. I wish I had more time over the past few months...and more money for gas. Then I would have been able to make more of an effort. Because I know now that this person is a good man. But what I really learned is that I would probably have never known that about him if he never told me that he did not care for me because I am not sure I would have had the honesty to do the same. So...the reality is that we both probably needed a second chance...and I think that is what we got from one another. And...it all started with honesty.

Stole-n

Next week I will be honored to kneel before God and be commissioned in the United Methodist Church (North Indiana Conference) by our bishop. I am humbled by the opportunity, by the realization of where God has taken us, and by the fear-filled, eager anticipation of what lies ahead.

This will also be the first time I will wear my clergy robe (other than seeing how good I look in our mirror). Those of us being commissioned were told that we need to have our robes but a stole will not be necessary. I wondered at this statement as I was unaware that one would even wear a stole for such an occasion.

I attended the ordination ceremony a couple of years ago for my friend/mentor. When he was ordained, he received a stole. He received a stole for a reason. A stole is a symbol of one's ordination...therefore...if one is not ordained they should not wear one.

Is it that one is not worthy of wearing a stole until they are ordained? Maybe. Once commissioned, you are placed on "probationary membership". To be put crudely, this means that the UMC is watching you to make sure you are fit and prepared for ordained elder status. Therefore, I ask the question again. Is one worthy of wearing a stole before they are ordained?

According to the United Methodist Church...the answer is no. "The stole is a sign of ordination, and it is placed on the shoulders of elders and deacons at ordination. The stole should be worn only by the ordained clergy." (http://www.gbod.org/worship/default_body.asp?act=reader&item_id=1768 Copyright © 2000-2003 The General Board of Discipleship.)

Yet...many people who are not ordained continue to wear a stole even though the are not "worthy". Maybe "worthy" is a strong term...then again...maybe not. There is something to be said for what God has done in the lives of those who have been ordained. And...if that is the case...I find it is important to pay my respects toward those individuals by not adorning myself with the symbol that has been placed on them. If I do...doesn't it devalue what the stole means? Or have we already devalued what the stole stands for?

Good...Grief...Good Grief

Children grow. It is a plain and simple truth of life. A little under 8 months ago, as you know, Melissa and I were blessed with a beautiful baby girl. Over the 8 months, we have seen her grow and advance through the stages of development. Now she is crawling...or should I say...trying to skip crawling?

Maggie has always been strong. She has been able to support her own weight on her feet for...well, as long as I remember. since she has been able to crawl she has been pulling herself to her feet. This is awfully early as far as I am concerned.

This is all very good. We enjoy the fact that she is advanced in pretty much all areas of her development. I am not saying she is a genius...well...yes I am. I am a proud father...I can do that. I love the fact that she is growing up. I love the fact that she is developing and learning new things. It is exciting. (By the way...she just sat up on her own for the first time tonight. How exciting!)

But...you know...when I see her do these things like crawl, pull herself up, talk, etc. I begin to feel something else. It is a little depressing. I remember the first time I saw her crawl across the floor without stopping. I felt as though I lost something...something special...something I will never get back. And...I did. I lost my little girl. The little girl who could only get to her knees and rock. But...when she did that...I lost the little girl that couldn't even get onto her knees. It goes all the way back to the first time I held her in my arms. Through the tears in my eyes I saw Magdalene Rae Johnson. My daughter. My child. The center of my world...in my arms. In a way...as she grows up, I continually lose that. It is a sense of grief.

So, things are good. She is developing better than average. It is exciting...it is joyful...it is good. But it is also sad. It is depressing to see your little girl grow and realize that she will never be that little girl who stared up at me that first day, laying her eyes on her daddy for the first time. But, it is a grief that we seek because we want her to grow and learn and develop.

In the end...maybe Charlie Brown had it right. Maybe it is not good. Maybe it is not grief. Maybe in the midst of a cartoon that has entertained for generations is found the term that best describes the feelings of a fairly new father who loves his daughter more than the world will ever know and struggles to find the words to express these emotions. "Good grief!"

This is the Great Life that God has Given Us.

As I read my wife's post about Maggie and her first Easter (which you can read at http://miamidolfans.blogspot.com/) I noticed something that made me really think. Toward the conclusion of her post, Melissa said that, "this is the great life that God has given us."

As I read this I could not help but think about Easter. Easter is the celebration of the resurrection of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. It is through this great miracle that we were given the gift of eternal life. Life...a gift from God. But, it is important to note that she said it was a "great" life. This is the point in which I realized that we have been residing in Easter for the past six months.

Often times in referring to those who are grieving, we speak of what day they are experiencing. They could be experiencing the pain and loss of Good Friday, the wilderness that is Saturday, or they could be experiencing the hope that is found on Easter Sunday. As we celebrate Lent and Easter, we walk a journey in this way. This year I feel as though we, meaning Melissa and I, simply skipped Good Friday and Saturday and proceeded right to Easter. Allow me to explain.

It all started on September 5th, 2007. It was this evening that Melissa informed me that she was having contractions that were five minutes apart. For those of you who do not know...this means that you are close to the point of going to the hospital. We left that evening to go to Central Baptist and would return a couple of days later, never to return to life as we knew it before.

We came home with the most beautiful, happy, precious little girl in the world. The level of pride that we have in Magdalene and all that she has done since then is tremendous. I cannot begin to tell you how much she has taught us about God...and how much we love her. She is the single greatest thing that has ever happened to us. She has done nothing but strengthen our marriage and our family. God definately blessed us with this child and through her...we have experienced Easter.

On February 24th, I had my commissioning interviews with the Board of Ordained Ministry. It was a nerve-racking experience that created much stress and doubt in my mind. I was worried as the North Indiana Conference has had more pastors than they have had appointments. When I returned home that evening, I recieved a call informing me that I had indeed been approved for commissioning. This means that Melissa can stay at home while I serve as a pastor of a local church because an appointment is guaranteed for those who are commissioned. God blessed us in this news and through this...we have experienced Easter.

Approximately one month later, I recieved a phone call from my DS. I was told it was extremely early to find out...but nonetheless...I was informed that the Bishop had appointed me to a local church as the lead pastor. Needless to say, we were thrilled. Finally, we could see what we have been striving toward for quite some time now. God has blessed us with an appointment and through this...we have experienced Easter.

All of these things made it difficult to really place myself into a "Lenten" state of mind. The reality is that we have been in Easter for quite some time now. And...I am not entirely sure that I will ever be able to really experience Lent like I used to. Each day I have the wonderful opportunity to hug and kiss Magdalene. And each time that she looks at me and smiles from ear to ear when I come home...or for that matter...simply enter the room, I experience Easter all over again. In that I see hope...I see love...I see Christ.

But...I guess I have to remember...we live on this side of the resurrection. We are celebrating the Easter joy continuously. Do we have to really experience Lent in a particular way? I don't think so. Because, in the midst of Lent we understand what Christ did for us. We observe the dark day of Good Friday and the wilderness of Saturday. However, unlike those who stood near the cross like Mary Magdalene...we know what is to come. There is hope...there is joy...there a peace in knowing that we are loved.

So, I guess, each time God blesses us with something like an appointment or the beautiful smile of a little girl...we can always rest in knowing that, "this is the great life that God has given us."

She's Everything

As I am no poet...there are times that you hear the lyrics to a song that seem to speak words that you couldn't find on your own. Maybe it is because I have not tapped into my semantic reservoir. Or, maybe it is because I am not talented at poetry. I like to think it is the latter.

In any regard...as I drove down the road the other day I heard a song I had heard a number of times before. This time it was different. I think it was because I was on my way to a job in the evening while my wife and daughter were at home. I really am not a fan of being gone in the evening because that is my time with my family...and that is extremely important to me. So, as I drove toward Lexington I guess I was slightly bummed that I was headed north rather than heading south toward home. The song came on, the one I had heard many times before, but this time it spoke a little differently to me. I guess for the first time I actually took the time to listen to the words and understood that the lyrics were really my own.

Brad Paisley - She's Everything

She's a yellow pair of running shoes
A holey pair of jeans
She looks great in cheap sunglasses
She looks great in anything
She's I want a piece of chocolate
Take me to a movie
She's I can't find a thing to wear
Now and then she's moody

She's a Saturn with a sunroof
With her brown hair a-blowin
She's a soft place to land
And a good feeling knowing
She's a warm conversation
That I wouldn't miss for nothing
She's a fighter when she's mad
And she's a lover when she's loving

[Chorus]
And she's everything I ever wanted
And everything I need
I talk about her, I go on and on and on
because she's everything to me

She's a Saturday out on the town
And a church girl on Sunday
She's a cross around her neck
And a cuss word 'cause its Monday
She's a bubble bath and candles
Baby come and kiss me
She's a one glass of wine
And she's feeling kinda tipsy

She's the giver I wish I could be
And the stealer of the covers
She's a picture in my wallet
Of my unborn children's mother
She's the hand that I'm holding
When I'm on my knees and praying
She's the answer to my prayer
And she's the song that I'm playing

[Repeat chorus]

She's the voice I love to hear
Someday when I'm ninety
She's that wooden rocking chair
I want rocking right beside me
Everyday that passes
I only love her more
Yeah, she's the one
That I'd lay down my own life for

And she's everything I ever wanted
And everything I need
She's everything to me
Yeah she's everything to me

Everything I ever wanted
And everything I need
She's everything to me
Yeah shes everything to me
everything to me

Appointed!

Well...it happened. On Tuesday, I received the phone call I have been waiting for. My District Superintendent called. When I returned the call, he gave me the number to my new DS because the Bishop had appointed me to a church in his district. Just a couple of days later, Melissa, Maggie, and myself were headed for Indiana to meet with the SPRC (Staff Parish Relations Committee). After meeting with them...it was official. Starting in July, I will be the Senior Pastor of Mt. Etna United Methodist Church in Indiana.

It feels good knowing where we are going...and...at the same time...it is terrifying. After years of waiting, I have met some of the over one hundred people that I will be ministering too. The task is so daunting, yet so exciting. Thankfully, just as God has gotten us through this journey, he will lead us through the new season in our lives that begins in just a few short months.

Below is a picture taken from Google Maps (I looked up Mt Etna, Indiana). The picture shows the church property just west of "town" (I use "town" loosely because there are more people in the church than there are in the town). They built the church in 2005, and from the looks of the picture, it too was created in 2005. Picture a pond between the church and highway 9...and some grass...and you have the church. From all of the Johnsons (even Maggie)...God is good.

I Hope...

As I have stated before, having a daughter has completely changed my life. Since day one people have continually asked the question...'who does she look like?' Well...we have found that it really just depends on who you ask. If you ask Melissa's side of the family, she is a spitting image of Melissa. If you ask my side, she looks like me. But, I chalk both of those up to the fact that each side of the family has only watched one of us grow up. So...for a decision we must resort to the parents...that being us. And we say, she does not look like either of us. She is Magdalene Rae Johnson. Thank God she is not just like either of us. She is completely her own person and I praise God for that every day. She does not look like one of us in particular and she does not act like one of us in particular. She is a beautiful blend of both Melissa and myself.

With all of these questions, however, I have been compelled to think about who she is like (which there is little conclusion on anything about her) and who she will be like in the future. So, I have compiled a short list of what characteristics of us that I hope she picks up.


When she is challenged, I hope she fights like me.
When she is happy, I hope she laughs like mom.

At day, I hope she plays like me.
At night, I hope she sleeps like mom.

When it storms, I hope she is in awe like me.
When it snows on Christmas, I hope she rejoices like mom.

I hope she thinks about her beliefs like me.
I hope she holds to them like mom.

I hope she cheers for her team like me.
I hope she can let go like mom.

I hope she is emotional like me.
I hope she is strong like mom.

I hope she is encouraging like me.
I hope she cares for her loved ones like mom.

I hope she is proud of being American like me.
I hope she is proud of her ancestry like mom.

I hope she runs like me.
I hope she swims like mom.

I hope she hugs like me.
I hope she hugs like mom.

I hope she learns from her mistakes like me.
I hope she avoids mistakes like mom.

I hope she finds someone who loves her like me.
I hope she loves him like I am by her mom.

I hope she leads like me.
I hope she follows like mom.

I hope she stays up like me.
I hope she wakes up like mom.

I hope she forgives like me.
I hope she loves like mom.

But, most importantly, I hope when people look at her they don't see me or her mom...but Christ.

Commissioned!

Over the course of August, September, and October, I spent a lot of time completing paperwork for my conference. After completing it all, I had to ship it to my registrar. 100's of pages and 150 staples later, it was complete and I could breath.

But, not for long. It was shortly after turning in all of this work that I was informed that things were tight in the North Indiana Conference and they may have to limit the number of people being commissioned. This was a bit nerve-racking. For those of you who don't know the UMC process, commissioning, in a nut-shell means a guaranteed full-time appointment and that Melissa would be able to stay at home with Maggie once we are placed in a church. This, needless to say, would be huge in giving us at least some security going into the future.

On Wednesday I met with the Board of Ordained Ministry for my interviews. The evening, we received the news of our blessing that I will be commissioned on May 31st of this year. What a blessing it is to know that even when we doubt ourselves and worry about our future, God is always encouraging, supporting, and providing. We truly do serve an amazing God.

I told you so.

Well...I hate to be the one to say it. No...that's not true! I love it! I was right! The Colts lost in the playoffs only to end in a disappointing fashion for all those who have been misled into cheering for them. I guess there is little to be said here other than. I told you so. (See previous post entitled "Not a Two Horse Race")

I wasn't the only one who predicted such a feat. (See previous post entitled "The Joy of Parenthood")

It has been a great playoff so far. The Chargers and Patriots are still in the mix. The Colts, Cowboys, and Steelers are all out. All things are looking good. And there is still more football to come.

The Joy of Parenthood

Ah...what a joy it is to see that your child is growing up right. It warms my heart to see such a beautiful and wonderful sight. ;)




What did I tell you? Simply marvelous!!

An Intense Focus

You know...having a daughter is probably the most humbling and amazing circumstance that I have ever had in my life. From day one she has captivated my heart and all of my attention. She is by far the most important person in my life. I always thought after meeting Melissa that I could love no one more than I love her. I don't know if it is that I love Magdalene more (I hate saying that I love any human more than my wife) or if it is just different. I think the safe way to go is to say that I love them differently. In saying that I avoid the false connotation that I do not love Melissa as much as I do. I mean...seriously...I would die for either one of them in the blink of an eye.

There is just something different with Maggie. I can't really put my finger on it. Maybe it is the fact that she is really the amazing result of the love that Melissa and I have. Maybe it is that every time I look at Magdalene...I see her mother. Maybe it is that every time I look at Magdalene and see how happy she is I see how happy we are. Maybe it is that every time I hear her I am breathless and in awe of the miraculous blessing that God has placed in our lives. Maybe...just maybe...when I look in her beautiful eyes I find myself looking at the majesty of God.

Over the past four months, I have learned a lot about God. Most of the time this comes from the emotions and revelations I have when I consider and understand my relationship to her. But over the past couple of weeks, Magdalene has taught me something new. It is not about how God feels about us or how much he loves us. This time it is about how we relate to God. It is a lesson about the relationship from the side of the sinner.

Like always, Maggie has been doing this thing that melts my heart every time. It can happen at pretty much any time. She will stare. She will sit in her mother's lap or in the corner of the couch and stare. The lesson that I found is in what she stares at. She stares at me. I mean right at me. There is no question what she is looking at. She does not blink. She does not turn away. She is intently focused on my face. As if she is trying to see into my soul...she just stares. I have tried on a number of occasions to have a staring contest...but she always wins. She is good.

She just sits there and is intensely focused on her father's face. It makes me think about how we too should be focused on our Father's face. The face is the reflection of one's character and their personality. We do not judge people's personality by their feet or their hands...but rather by their face. Throughout Scripture the face of God is used in a way to signify the presence of God or the character of God. This is not always the case...but sometimes to refer to the face of God is to refer to the presence and character of God.

We do well to intensely focus on our Father. To look into His face is to understand who He is and learn from Him. As Maggie focuses on me, she will also try to mimic the movements of my mouth and the sounds if I exaggerate them for her. She is learning from me because she is focused on me. How often is it that we are in a position to look into the face of God but fail to do so. All we have to do is turn away from whatever it is that is taking our time and turn our heads toward Him. Who knows...maybe we will learn something. Maybe we will become more like Him because we will begin to mimic His character and His personality. Maybe, a mere child can teach us all something about our relationship to our Father and how we should interact with Him. It is not enough to simply glance at our Father. Instead, our focus on our Father should be one of intensity and determination...where we do not blink.

Not a two horse race!

I found it interesting as I was in Indiana over the holiday that the hatred for the New England Patriots is so strong. The Colts' pseudo-fan contingent makes assertions such as..."they are cheaters," or "their coach is a jerk," or "they run the score up on people. That is the only reason Brady broke the record." Ah...the joy I get from hearing such fallacious arguments. It makes me chuckle. For one...it is clear by the way the patriots got to 16-0 that any cheating on their part would be unnecassary and pointless. No cheating would enable them to do what they did. Secondly, get over the fact that Coach B. keeps to himself and does not seem to like shaking hands after a game. Thirdly...Tom Brady just complete what could be considered the single greatest season for a quarterback...ever! This is coming from someone who is a dedicated Dan Marino supporter, who before this year held that honor. Tom Brady's breaking of the TD record was momentous and far greater than the 49 that the QB for Indy threw for in 2004. Which, oddly enough, if you watched that season, one would see that they too "ran the score up" on opponents. So yes, Tom Brady's record is just as "legit" as the QB in Indy's was. Besides, Marino's 48 was a greater accomplishment than 49 in 2004...and there is good support for such a view. Trust me.

It seems that the entire focus in the minds of those who support Indy for now...while they are winning...is on New England. However, we do well to remember that in the AFC playoffs are 6 good teams. All of which could beat anyone else. I would say the weakest is probably the Titans. So, if we toss them out, we are left with the Chargers, the Steelers, the Jags, the Colts, and the Patriots. I would not want to face either of these teams in the playoffs. They are all dangerous...and they can all beat each other. During my trip to Indiana, however, I hear countless people tell me that Indy would go to New England and end their unbeaten streak. For your sake...I hope that the Colts aren't thinking that. Because most likely, they will be playing San Diego first...who beat Indy in the regular season after handing the game to Indy on a silver platter. Apparently Indy did not know how to take it...because they tossed that game away.

It is much too easy to look forward too far. We can look at where we want to be but forget that we have to take ourselves there. We must first have victory "A" before we can ever have victory "B". Maybe it is time that Colt fans stop hating New England. At least stop lying about why you hate them. You don't hate them because they cheat, or because of their attitudes, or because they run the score up. You don't even hate them because they are good. You hate them because they are better. And that stings.

A New Day

It is official. A new day is upon us where children rejoice and men weep with joy. A day that brings great happiness and jubilation. A day that will forever be etched in the minds and hearts of all who are living. The Miami Dolphins have been victorious. They have defeated the Baltimore Ravens. Let's hear it now...three cheers for the Phins. Hip hip hooray! Hip hip hooray! Hip hip hooray!

Indeed, the 1976 Tampa Bay Buccaneers retain their sole claim to the only winless season. Pop the cork on the champagne! You can celebrate once again Buc fans...you don't have to share the record books with anyone!

As the Dolphins awaited a Matt Stover (Ravens) field goal attempt in overtime you could feel what was going to happen. You see the Phins have lost 6 games by three points. 6 games! That means there have been 6 games that the Phins almost won. As Stover, who is a pretty clutch kicker, lined up...you just knew that this would be number 7. But, to our great ecstasy...he missed. We had another shot.

A couple plays later Cleo Lemon hit Greg Camarillo with a short pass and Greg proceeded to sprint to the goal line for a 64 yard TD! The Phins win! The Phins win! Going into the game on Sunday, Camarillo had only caught one ball for 2 yards. The only time his name was ever really mentioned in the post-game comments before was in regards to a holding penalty that brought back a Ted Ginn Jr. kick return for a touchdown. They lost that game by three points.

In Miami...and the hearts of Dolfans everywhere, Camarillo is a hero. I guess you could say that he is the savior of the Dolphins season. A receiver who no one expected would change the game as he did. The defense accounted for the speed of Ginn and the strength of Booker. They even took care of Martin. They didn't however account for what an unknown receiver who after leaving Stanford, was not recruited. If you watch the play...you can see that the safety did not respect his abilities. He was too worried about the other guys.

The defense was watching for something. They were watching for many things. They thought the "savior" would be Ginn or Booker. Never did they think it would be Camarillo. But it was. And, they were not ready for it.

It sounds a little like people waiting for a savior that fit their paradigm of what a savior should be. The Bible depicts many people doing the same thing. They were looking for a king or a warrior. Anything...but certainly not a child...born in a manger...to a family that was not of royalty. A boy that would grow up to reject the idea that a savior had to be a warrior or a king. He was who He was...the unexpected expected one.

The moral of the story? Well...the Dolphins win!!!!!! That was pretty much my point...the rest were just rambles. Do with it what you wish.

No Fairweather Fans Here

So, if you have not heard this before, my biggest pet-peeve is when someone is a fairweather fan. You can be a fan of any football team and you don't have to have any good reasons to be a fan...I mean...look at Colt fans. While I was in high school my frustration with fairweather fans developed. I even wrote an article about it in the school newspaper. Not many people liked the article because...I think...they knew I was talking about them.

Fairweather fans are those who only like a team when they are doing well. For instance...Colt fans. They are the ones that spurred the article in the first place. The year was 1995. Jim Harbaugh was the quarterback and the Colts were entering the playoffs. It was just four years earlier that the Colts went 1-15 for the season and just 8-8 in 1994. Things were different now. Not because they were in the playoffs...while that was different. No...things were different because there were fans! The Colts were winning and people were supporting them. I predicted that year in my article...I remember my words clearly..."When they lose...and they will lose...no one will care about the Colts anymore." Within 2 years the Colts' record was 3-13 and the fans were gone. They then drafted a quarterback from Tennessee and some fans began to pop up. Now they win games and there are fans again. Shocking! Many of these people grew up in the very area in which the Colts play...and they finally become fans when the team could be considered "winners". They never even acknowledged that the team was there before. What will happen, I wonder, when they struggle again like they did for so many years? Will the fans turn back to the Pacers...who they have bailed on...since they don't win like they used to?

If you can't tell or don't know, I don't like the Colts (if you don't know that...you don't know me very well). So imagine my frustration. All these fairweather fans watch their team win (who they have supported for a couple of years and claim that "I have always like the Colts") while I, who have remained a Dolphins fan since I was five years old am enduring a season that could end up 0-16...while I do not think it will.

People have asked me..."Why do you like the Dolphins? They suck!" My response...well...I guess it is loyalty. For me it is not about following a winner. That would be selfish on my part wouldn't it? I mean...do I really need a sports team to fulfill some void in my life of overcoming something or of being better than someone else? I hope not. I could always go cheer for the Patriots. They win. But...then I wouldn't be a fan. I would just be a passenger on the bandwagon waiting for the next one to drive by.

An article was recently posted on the Miami Herald's website about the Dolphin fans' viewing habits. Viewership is up. We have not won a game...but more people are watching than years past. Why is that? Because we are fans. We are not fickle. We are loyal. I am proud to be a Dolphins fan. Being a fan in a season like this provides some sort of ownership of my fandom. It is a season like this that builds a real fan...not a fairweather fan...not a Colt fan (I had to get one more jab in there).

Tomorrow I leave for Buffalo to attend the Dolphins vs. Bills game. Win or lose...I am still a Dolphins fan...just maybe a little more frustrated. So...enough with the questions on why I am still a Dolphins fan. Because...the question is really more telling of the asker's fandom than my response is of mine.

Magdalene's Balancing Act

We have been extremely impressed with Magdalene's strength. Between holding her head up really well from week one to rolling over three months before she is "supposed to", we have come to see that she is a very strong little girl. Recently, I discovered that she will sit up in my hand. With a little bit of balancing on my part, she balances herself really well. All I have to do is make sure she does not jerk around and fall off. Check out the video of Maggie's balancing act. I am a proud father!

Hate Mongers

I use the term hate mongers...only because it is the term that was used by ABC News...and I guess, like television I use it for sensationalism. Last night I saw two minutes of television that made my heart weep. You may have heard about Westboro Baptist Church (They are not actually associated with the Baptist denomination). They spend much of their time protesting funerals of fallen U.S. soldiers. The protests are not anti-war protests. What they are claiming is that the soldiers are evil because they fight for and support a nation that supports homosexuality.

The Church, started by Fred Phelps, consists of about 70 people or so...most of which are his extended family. They have protested numerous funerals over the past couple of years. They hit the news recently because they were ordered by the courts to pay around $11 million to a family who's sons funeral they protested at. They will appeal. The interesting thing is that they have hired got the ACLU to support them. This is slightly humorous to me. They protest soldiers and call them evil for fighting for a country that supports homosexuals...yet they are willing to employ the services of a group that spends much time doing the same thing.

Their signs say things like, "God hates you" or "God hates fags" or "Fags die, God laughs". Their message, while sounding harsh and...well...mean, is seen as kind by those who preach it. They feel that it is a message that needs to be spread all across the world. And...from the sounds of it they will continue to spread this false gospel.

I think this group can easily be considered a cult. At the very least...they are not preaching the Gospel message that we call Christian. However...like many cults, they too claim to get their message from the Scriptures.

I mentioned before that this two minutes of programming made my heart weep. The real reason that my heart wept was because of how they are raising their children. The segment of the news program that I observed was focused on the children. They protest too. The mother was arrested, in fact, because she allowed her ten year old son to trample an American flag at a protest.

These children are so young (some younger than ten). And...they are brainwashed. Here are some excerpts from the interview (you can find the entire story on abcnews.go.com/2020):

"They just want to kill us pretty much," said 8-year-old Noah Phelps-Roper, one of Shirley's 11 children. "Because we're preaching the message. … Because they don't like our message."

Ten-year-old Jonah Phelps-Roper says his favorite flag is one that says "Fags Doom Nations." "I like that sign," he said.

When asked what the word "fag" means, Jonah replied "A fag is someone … who … I can't really explain."

"A fag is someone who does not obey the word of God," said Noah.

What is not recorded in the transcript online (which was posted before the broadcast so not everything is there) is the final words in that conversation by Noah. He said..."A fag is someone who does not obey the word of God. A fag is like a Jew."

Wow. This breaks my heart. These poor kids don't even know what is meant by "fag" as their parents use it. They seem to have no idea. At the conclusion of the show a young girl...maybe two years old...sang a song. It was a song of hate. It spoke of God's wrath and how we are all going to hell.

I am left speechless and saddened at such a horrible reality. Is there a difference between them and the KKK, White Supremacy groups, Skinheads, etc.? I am troubled at the unfortunate fact that there are many funerals that people are seeing these protests...and that is their interaction with...well so-called Christians. Will they use the same brush to paint our churches as they use to paint Westboro? Will we be seen in the same light? Also...who will be the ones to reach out to the poor children who have been wrapped up in the hate and intolerance of their families?

My heart continues to weep, knowing that the name of Christ is being used in such a way. May this never be.

I know that the issues of homosexuality is a polarizing one. I do not wish to delve into this topic...only to say that I believe it is incompatible with Christian teaching. I do not believe, however, that our soldiers are being punished for our nations support of homosexuals.

Here is what I do believe. I believe that all people are made in the image of God. There is nothing about anyone that is beyond the redemptive work of Christ.

As we have two sides to this issue...the answer is not hate...nor is it blind tolerance or pluralism. We must, as the Body of Christ, find a way to love all people and speak truth. This is possibly the most difficult choice. It is much easier to enter into pluralism as to avoid the issue or begin to hate as this group has chosen. It is more difficult to love and speak truth in a loving way. But...this is the way of Christ...and therefore the way of the Body of Christ.

The Holy Church of...Blackjack?

The Church should stand as the moral and obviously spiritual example to the world. As a prospective minister in the United Methodist Church, I commit myself to living by the highest ideals of a Christian lifestyle. All ministers in the UM Church take this pledge. As representatives of the Church it is important that we do this. This is important for all Christian denominations and groups. It just seems so obvious why this is important.

Last weekend, Jessamine County (in which I reside) had their yearly "Jessamine Jamboree". It is a fun time (I guess...I was not there). As I read the flyer listing the numerous events and activities taking place, something struck me as odd...and to be honest...disheartening.

The local Catholic Church was participating in the activities. I have heard recently that they brought in over $30,000 at their church. That is pretty good for two days of work. $15,000 a day is considered in most circles to be a good profit. However, the means by which this money came is what concerns me so much. What did they offer the people of Jessamine County you ask? Well...they sold beer and held Bingo, Texas Hold'em, and Poker events. They were not using fake money and the beer was not non-alcoholic.

Now...I am not up on Catholic theology to speak to their doctrines and dogmas in regard to drinking and gambling. I do know though how the United Methodist Church views these things...to which I am in full agreement.

Gambling - "Gambling is a menace to society, deadly to the best interests of moral, social, economic, and spiritual life, and destructive of good government. As an act of faith and concern, Christians should abstain from gambling and should strive to minister to those victimized by the practice...The Church should promote standards of personal lifestyles that would make unnecessary and undesirable the resort to commercial gambling - including public lotteries - as a recreation, as an escape, or as a means of producing public revenues or funds for support of charities or government." - United Methodist Book of Discipline, Paragraph 163G.

Alcohol - "We affirm our long-standing support of abstinence from alcohol as a faithful witness to God's liberating and redeeming love for all persons." - UM BOD, Paragraph 162J.

I do not think, judging by the UMC's stance on these issues, that this would fly in our church. At least it shouldn't. This is not to say that the UMC is any better than any other Christian group but that all Christians should have these views.

Drinking is simply pointless and gambling is a poor use of finances which, as far as I am concerned, is against everything that Jesus taught about the use of financial resources. However, my thoughts are not the issue. The question is whether or not a church should promote and facilitate such activities.

It is probably clear by now that my answer to that would be a resounding...NO!! As an example of the things that could go wrong...I was told by someone who was there that a gentleman was talking to a young lady when another man approached him and informed the first gentleman that he was speaking to the wrong girl. Apparently they were an item. The second man told the first that he would be waiting for him. Following the first man's departure, the second man and a couple of his friends "jumped" the other man and beat him to the point that he was taken to the hospital. This all started at a drinking and gambling event at a church. But hey...they took in $30,000.

My biggest issue with this actually comes from Scripture. Paul, in writing to the church in Corinth, addresses the issue of food that has been sacrificed to idols. The question was...do we eat it? He responded by saying that the idols are false in the first place. They are, in effect, sacrificed to nothing. There is only one God...not many. But, as Paul says, not everyone knows that. Some people think that in eating the sacrificed meat they become defiled...because they are so used to idols. "But food does not bring us near to God; we are no worse if we do not eat, and no better if we do" (1 Cor. 8:8). There you have it. It does not matter because food sacrificed to a false god is no more than any other food. You may be wondering where I am going with this. Well...I think I am better off letting Paul make the point.

"Be careful, however, that the exercise of your freedom does not become a stumbling block to the weak. For if anyone with a weak conscience sees you who have this knowledge eating in an idol's temple, won't he be emboldened to eat what has been sacrificed to idols? So this weak brother, for whom Christ died, is destroyed by your knowledge. When you sin against your brothers in this way and wound their weak conscience, you sin against Christ. Therefore, if what I eat causes my brother to fall into sin, I will never eat meat again, so that I will not cause him to fall." (1 Cor. 8:9-13)

Paul does not decide not to eat the meat because it was sacrificed to idols. That didn't matter to him. He decided not to eat the meat because it may hurt the faith of others. "The mission of the Church is to make disciples of Jesus Christ by proclaiming the good news of God's grace and by exemplifying Jesus' command to love God and neighbor, thus seeking the fulfillment of God's reign and realm in the world" (BOD, Paragraph 121). If this is our mission...and we are stumbling blocks to our brothers and sisters...we have to ask ourselves...are we paying attention to the right thing?

I think that Paul's message extends far beyond eating sacrificed meats or holding drinking and gambling events at church. Paul speaks to the heart and soul of everyone. If we are going to care more about Christ and His people then we should be willing to give up some things that will cause others to stumble. Whether it be drinking, gambling, stealing, cheating, fighting, swearing, or...$30,000...we do well to ensure that it does not get in the way of allowing the light of Christ shine through us. Otherwise...not only are we doing a dis-service to those around us...but aren't we also doing a dis-service to God?

A taste of the Divine

Every once in a while, God gives humanity what I call a taste of the Divine. Sometimes these are grand movements in the Church, and sometimes they are simply moments in the personal experience of a servant of Christ. A couple of nights ago, I received a taste of the Divine through the heart of my wife.

Magdalene was having a rough night. She was little gassy but at the time, we did not know what was wrong. She has been absolutely perfect for us. She rarely ever cries and when she does it does not last for long. Feeding her did not work, nor did holding her against my chest, which works most of the time. We tried to burp her, but to no prevail.

It was a frustrating time for both of us. But, this is why we did not want people staying with us. We need to get through this stuff on our own.

As I sat on the floor of Magdalene's room, fretting over trying to determine what was wrong, Melissa came in and sat beside me. Eventually I passed Maggie over to Liss and she held her for a few minutes. I noticed soon enough that tears began to stream down Melissa's face. As she looked at Maggie she said, "I just love her so much. I just want to fix whatever is wrong." There it was. A taste of the Divine.

I believe that God looks at us at times, with tears in His eyes and says, "I just love you so much. I just want to fix whatever is wrong." The love that God has for us will never be comprehended. it is too great. In the same way, Magdalene will never know how much we love her. It is too great.

As Melissa said these things, Magdalene's crying slowed down and soon stopped altogether. I like to think that she felt her mother's love at that moment. When we are in pain...when we are crying out...when we need love...do we feel the love of God?

Here is the good news. In our relationship with God, we have an advantage over Maggie's relationship with her parents. We can tell God what is wrong. We can hand over the reigns to our pain, our sorrow, and our heartache and allow God to heal. He desires to fix us...we just have to let Him.

Becoming a parent has truly opened my eyes to the love of God in a new and fresh way. Without hesitating...without pause...without thinking twice...I would die for that little girl. It is interesting how Christ felt the same way about us.

Maggie's Smile

We have noticed over the past couple of days that Magdalene will actually smile while she sleeps. She has also done this a couple of times while feeding and just looking around but it most often occurs while sleeping. Is she aware of what she is doing? Probably not...but she does it, and as far as I am concerned...that is a sign of a happy baby. At least a baby with happy dreams. Here is a very short video of her doing her nap-time smile.

Welcome to the real world!

MAGDALENE RAE JOHNSON

Well...after Bible study on Wednesday night, our precious little girl decided that hearing about Jesus was so great that she wanted to join us. That's right...we are now proud parents! Melissa was actually in labor during the Bible study but it was obviously not difficult labor for her since she did not tell me until about an hour afterward.

By the time we got home... the Doctor told us to come in to the hospital. We arrived at approx. 10pm and were told that this was the real deal. We realized then that we would never go home again as a simple couple...but always as a complete family.


Magdalene Rae (named after the first person to spread the good news that Christ was risen) was born at 2:06pm on September 6th, 2007. She is perfect! So beautiful, so sweet, and so small. She was only 6 pounds and 3 ounces and measured in at 19 inches long. She is amazingly good. Hopefully it stays that way...but no matter what...she is the cutest little girl I have ever seen.

Here tiny little self is so small that it fits in the palm of my hand. In fact...if you go to http://babycentral.centralbap.com/default.asp?group=41358 you can see the picture that Central Baptist posted online. She is sitting in my hand and it really shows how tiny she really is. Notice the hair on her shoulder and back. She has a lot of hair. It is really cute. Mommy had hair like that when she was born so it is only right that Magdalene has that too. It is their special bond. As for her head...you can see that she has a lot of hair up there. In fact, a pastor who came to visit us in the hospital said that he was very jealous of her. He is not so fortunate in the area of hair up there.

Melissa did it all with no drugs. She went completely natural. She is my hero. As I watched her go through it all, I knew that she would make it without drugs but I never thought she would do it with flying colors like she did. She is stronger than I could ever be. I know that labor can be tough...and extremely exhausting but she made it look so easy. She was made for this.

Anyway...our lives have changed dramatically for the better and we couldn't be more excited. God has truly blessed us and I pray that she will be a blessing to Him as she grows up to become a better disciple of Christ than we are.

I have to say...when all was said and done, God did quite a number on my humility level. When you see your child born and hold her the first time...your priorities get in line if they weren't before and you feel the love of God in a whole new way. In a way that you just can't describe. She is truly a gift from God. Thanks be to God!




Thank you to all who were praying for us and thinking about us. Hope to see you all soon.


This is awesome...for the first time I get to sign off by saying..."So long from Tony, Melissa, and Magdalene!" That feels nice.